The USA has The World Trade Center. Canada? Well.. we have Tim Hortons!
A certain right wing blogger that I don’t link to for my own quality control purposes was covering the explosion at a Tim Horton’s in Toronto today. What is really funny is to read some of the comments by visitors to her blog.
Here’s a selection, for your own amusement:
“I heard the same report over CTV – very tight-lipped cops, a bomb squad, and an uncomfirmed rumour about bombs strapped to the “victim”.
I wonder what the victim’s name is.”
~ Chris From Victoria
Yes, wondering about the person’s last name is of course, important! If it was “Murphy” or “O’Brien,” .. oh dear, has the IRA really disbanded? An oriental last name? Ahh… must be a descendant of one of those kamikaze airplane pilots. Now, if his last name was O’Brien, but he was from Jamaica, bet it was related to the fact Jamaica just elected their first woman Prime Minister, huh?
“If the guy did have a bomb belt, then it was a failed terrorist attack just like with Joel Henry Hinrichs III at the Oklahoma University stadium in which he got stupid, messed with his explosives and blew himself apart while waiting to enter and make his move.”
~ Canadian Sentinel
Yes, folks, Canadian Sentinel knows enough about bomb belts as well as each and every person’s motives to in fact determine if there was a “bomb belt,” it was terrorism!! I mean, we all know that no sane human being would attach a bomb belt and explode themselves. We know that from the Press, of course, where we get all our information on bomb belts, who uses them, and where. So, IF there was a bomb belt, we can KNOW it was a terrorist! And of course, we’ll somehow differentiate between some suicidal deranged individual who wanted to take himself out along with a few others, as a terrorist, by virtue of whether or not there was a “bomb belt.” Ah, yes, the Canadian Sentinel is standing up for Canada with logic and knowledge here.
” If, however, the deceased had explosives strapped to him, hoping to blow up innocent people, I hope that the police and the judiciary get to the bottom of who’s responsible TOUTE SUITE.
Toronto’s got to get its act together. Though I no longer live there, I grew up in Toronto, and in the past ten years I’ve seen it sliding badly downhill–bad roads, rude drivers, shootings, panhandlers every third step, a feeling of seediness: Yonge Street is a disgrace. I know a lot of people who are afraid to go to Toronto, which was never the case until recently.
David Miller and his overpaid minions had better snap to attention to figure out how to fix things–which means setting up programs other than “youth employment centres.” I mean law enforcement programs, where criminals are apprehended, whatever their ethnic background and whatever “the reasons” for their crime. No getting off the hook because you come from a disadvantaged background. (The vast majority of individuals from “disadvantaged backgrounds” live law-abiding lives, so it’s a lame-duck reason to excuse people who break the law.)
I’d suggest that David Miller talk to Rudy Guillani, who managed to clean up NYC, to the extent that it went from being one of the most crime-riddled cities in North America to being one of the safest. He used tough medicine–and Miller needs to do the same.”
~ New Kid On The Block
Now, “New Kid On The Block” really knows stuff, huh? I mean.. IF the person had a bomb belt, that means… well.. we gotta find out who was responsible, real fast!!!
I wonder if “New Kid On The Block” thinks it is as important to find out the identity of the person “responsible” if he in fact, didn’t have a “bomb belt.”
And of course, this all means that David Miller has to do something. David Miller is apparently, responsible for law enforcement in Ontario. “New Kid On The Block” must know something the rest of us don’t know.
” The jackals are indeed in charge. The head jackal being David Miller, a socialist born in England.”
~ Irwin Daisey
Yes, Irwin. Some suicidal creature that decides to blow himself up in the bathroom of a Tim Horton’s is all the fault of David Miller, a Socialist. What wonderful humour, Irwin. Will you go on stage for us? Of course, 15 years ago, when crack sluts were roaming the streets of Toronto, and gun shots were going off in housing projects nightly, that was the fault of… David Miller too!
“That Timmie’s is directly besides the subway entrance to Yonge/Bloor station, the busiest subway station in Toronto.
Why Sunday though? Trial run?”
~ BC Monkey
Yes, that must be it!! A trial run! Let’s see how many folks can get away with blowing themselves up in a Tim Horton’s bathroom, located beside subway stations, huh?
My god, BC Monkey has evolved into.. well.. let’s not say rational thought.. but.. at least seems to be able to ask weird questions.
“I don’t think there is any doubt about what has happened, especially in light of another suspicious package being found.”
~ A Steve
Oh, get this man on the case! He has NO DOUBT as to what happened. Another “suspicious package” somewhere just bloody well PROVES it, you know? Attack Tim Horton’s in Canada, and by god, that’s a statement to bring fear into the hearts of all good Canadians! There is NO DOUBT that some guy blew himself up, and another “suspicious package” found in another Tim Horton’s proves that A Steve KNOWS what happened.
Umm.. what happened, A Steve??
“BC Monkey has a pretty valid theory there…..
But we all have to wait….”
Oh my God, yes! That evolving Monkey has a valid theory. What was the theory? Steve agrees that it might have been a trial run? A trial run for what, exactly? I think Stephen and BC Monkey are close. Close as in.. maybe related?
” Yonge & Bloor is the busiest subway intersection in the city. Perhaps he was trying to arm the device before boarding a train… I mean, you wouldn’t want the thing hot in your home, or while you were driving to your target.
Or perhaps a walk-on at some swanky restaurant in Yorkville.”
Yes neo, you could be right! I take it from you nickname, you probably are “right.” But you’re probably incorrect as well. I mean, that would be just the perfect spot to “arm” a device, in the Tim Horton’s bathroom, right? That’s how Palestinians do it, huh? They go into bathrooms before arming their devices… umm.. don’t they do it that way? Someone once told me they did!
Now, MaryT has the definitive answer to what happened:
” Having just arrested suspected terrorists in TO, and now this, will the leftists admit that like Houston, we have a problem. Time for the mayor and friends to wake up. Not everybody loves us. I also would believe the target was the subway, and poor guy had to relieve himself. Probably set off the bomb or whatever by mistake. What is his name and nationality and religion. Watch out transit riders or Tim customers.”
There just has to be a connection, you know? The “poor guy” that was going to blow up people had to relieve himself first. Let’s not dare to think about the results if he hadn’t relieved himself before blowing himself up in the subway. I mean.. what a mess it would have been if his bowels or kidneys hadn’t been emptied first! That bad boy .. the poor guy.. was actually thinking about the victims and the mess he’d leave behind!! God, that terrorist MUST have been a misinformed socialist, who really didn’t want his shit to get in the way of any statement he was going to make. Poor guy.
“How common are “flash fires” in washrooms? Is it not possible for a poorly made bomb (or incendiary device) to have the effect of causing a “flash fire”? (rhetorical question)
I’m just glad noone else was hurt.”
~ CanForce 101
Uhhh.. now that is a god damn good question! How common exactly is this?? Whoa, man… that open up a ton of things for us to think about! You know, it really isn’t all that common for someone to blow themselves up in a Tim Horton’s bathroom, is it? Oh, that was my rhetorical question – just copying “CanForce 101″ here. But seriously.. flash fires, human remains with burn marks, etc etc… we really gotta realize and ask ourselves how “common” such a thing is!
Oh “spike” writes this:
“sounds like the london bombs the second time around.”
Uhhh.. which “london bombs,” spike? They got Tim Horton’s bathrooms in London??? Sheesh, maybe I should have bought some of that Tim Horton stock last week.
Ohhh.. and then Stephen comments again!! Here’s what he writes:
“Frustratingly noone is saying anything.
CTV did just report the police chief as saying
“It was a sudden flash fire that could have been much worse than it was”
Now what in the world could that mean…..
If this were New York or London there would have been a press conference by now, if not two of them with some indication of when the next press conference would be.
Absolutely terrible communication from everyone, all it leads to is this kind of speculation. Who knows this could be as simple as someone having a problem while they were freebasing, a la Richard Pryor.”
Poor frustrated Stephen!! Stephen wants more information, right this very minute, so he can form strong beliefs about… well.. something or other. At least he recognizes “speculation” when he sees it. Stephen, go have a glass of wine and hug a loved on, ok? You’ll be fine, I promise.
Now one guy adds some rational comment:
” I doubt this is a suicide bomber. They don’t isolate themselves before detonation. They look for crowds. So wrong place, wrong day of the week for a suicide bomber.
More likely an unstable person who wanted to go out with a message of some kind. Perhaps a disgruntled ex-employee.
The police are right to hold off talking until they know. We certainly don’t need more speculation. That’s the bloggers job!”
~ steve d
But then is answered with this amazing bit of questioning from our smart, intellectual formerly mentioned “Chris From Victoria BC:”
“How do you know all about a suicide bomber, steve d?Have you read a book on the topic or is this “everyone knows” information that uniquely resides in your brain?”
Ah yes, good question Chris!! Always fight off those people who would encourage us not to draw conclusions about anything, and demand to know from them what “they know.” When in fact, the point of the message was, “well, we don’t know anything yet.” God damn, I’m gonna find out who Chris votes for, and vote the same way! He makes sense, dontcha think?
“It in Toronto and you can bet your last buck … the spin is being spun behind closed doors.”
Yes, Duke. They LIE about EVERYTHING here. I bet it wasn’t even a Tim Horton’s. It was a Country Style.
And Duke comments again:
“Maybe it was spontaneous combustion. Muslims do that all the time.”
Really, Duke? You mean.. I shouldn’t associate with any Muslim, cuz, all the time, they just might combust? I know a few Irishmen that did that as well.
“The Tim Hortons is beside Starbucks, which is beside the Metropass/token entrance to the west end of the Yonge Platform. I’d say that’s pretty close.”
Ah, yes, someone pointed out that Tim Horton’s was about a block away from the Subway. So, now that it is beside Starbucks, which is beside the Metropass/token entrance, that makes it “pretty close.” It’s now more obvious that the real target was missed!! That poor guy really had to relieve himself and not shit his pants before he blew himself up you know.
“If this turns out to be suicide bomber, he could have been screwed up by the time change.”
~ Robin Banks
That’s it folks – it wasn’t that the guy needed to relieve himself at all! We can all now breathe a sigh of relief at the fact we no longer have to think of this person as a “poor guy” who needed to use the toilet. His watch was wrong, is all.
Ok, this enough… my sides are splitting – there is even more funny stuff over there, if you want to go read it and are looking for humour.
But for now, Canada has been hit!!! Tim Horton’s is the perfect place to make the initial “hit,” because there are 40 million Tim Hortons for a population of 35 million.
It just makes sense, you know?
Update: From CTV:
” Several hours after the explosion, Tim Hortons District Manager Amin Islam escorted the employees away.
The employees appeared shaken by their experience, but Islam said they were doing well.
“I’m just making sure they’re going home safely,” he said.”
What was that manager’s name? Amin Islam? No way.. must be a typo! No way a Muslim would do a thing like that, and rush to the scene, and try to make sure all the employees were ok, would he? He must be an Infidel Muslim! Muslims are those guys that spontaneously combust – they don’t rush off to help people! Get this guy out of Canada – he’s probably faking it or something.