My Son David: I Love You

There are times in one’s life when perhaps one does not know what the “right” thing is to do. Some private matters are best left private, but what happens when private matters spill out by another party, and false accusations are made about you?

That has happened to me on more than one occasion, and most recently, some very serious accusations have been made toward me, and I have been told, also to others who have a strong relationship with my ten year old son.

I have four sons. I love them all with all my heart. I have not been a perfect dad. I know I have made mistakes and I regret them very much. I look back at my life as a “dad,” and can see many times when I wished I handled a situation differently, or had more wisdom at the time. I do know however, that one of my highest values has been to strive to be a good dad and I think along the way, I’ve made some improvements. I am also keenly aware that I still have a long way to go, and I will never stop learning about this job of “fatherhood.”

I have also made mistakes in my personal life. There are some things I feel remorse and shame about. One of those things is an incident that occurred over the long weekend of May in 2010. I made a huge mistake. I got into my vehicle and drove after having a few drinks. I judgment about my ability to drive was impaired because I had a few drinks. I should not have driven. I fell asleep while driving, hit a curb, and got into an accident that totaled my vehicle. I was charged and convicted of Impaired Driving.

I am still paying for that mistake to this day, although all my legal fines and orders the court made against me have been fulfilled, and were fulfilled within the time frames the court ordered. My own sense of shame after the accident and the night the charge was laid was such that I felt compelled to apologize to my sons for my behaviour and for not being a very good role model that night.

I am not making excuses, but I do want to point out that I am not a serial drunk driver. I have over a million kilometers worth of driving experience. Other than a time when I was in my late teens and working a full time job while also trying to attend college full time and needing to rush between the two, I have had a total of two moving violations, both for speeding. I have gone through many random police spot checks during the course of those million + kilometers of driving. The last moving violation for speeding that I had was in the spring of 2002. The one previous to that was in about 1996.

During the time of my impaired driving charge, and up until about the following December, my living circumstances were also a struggle for me, for a few reasons that I will not get into. However, although I was trying, during that time, I had no real permanent living place.

It was a tough time.

It has come to my attention, that a person has made very very false allegations against me that have included that apparently, after I was charged with impaired driving and lost my licence and my vehicle, that I “barely attempted any contact” with my son David, who at the time was 7 years old. Normally I would not care about such a spurious allegation, but it has also come to my attention that this allegation, this slander, has been made to people who have a close relationship with David. And apparently, those people have been lead to believe this outright false statement is the truth.

I would like to set the record straight and ask some questions of you, my dear reader, whoever you might be, after I set the record straight, below. This person has also made unrelated but equally serious allegations against me as well, which I will also point to.

So Let’s Get The Facts Straight, With Some Photo Evidence:

After my impaired driving charge, which was on May 24th, 2010, I ended up staying in Orangeville for at least a week and had daily contact with my son. In addition to that, David traveled out of town with his mom for about ten days if memory serves correct, returning on June 16th. While David was in Edmonton, I continued to stay in Orangeville, looking after David’s (and his mom’s) Maltese dog while they were away. I sent multiple emails to David’s email address and enjoyed phone conversations with him while he was away.

When David returned with his mom, I returned to a trailer that had been purchased and was to be used for a “home base” for myself, prior to my impaired charge. The location of this trailer is about 15 km from Orangeville. There is no public transportation from Orangeville to the area of the location of the trailer.

While David and his mom were out of town, I contacted her asking about the possibility of me taking David with me to the trailer that I was trying to make into my home upon their return for a few days.

July Contact With David

On July 1st,  I made arrangements directly with David’s mom to have David with me, at the trailer for several days. Indeed, it was arranged that David would have a ride with his mom and his mom’s friend to my location.

In July, I introduced David to the outdoor swimming pool, which he loved and made friends with other kids at. Although I myself had arranged for and taken David to swimming lessons over the course of the previous couple of years, there was still some timidness on David’s part. However, David and I had a great time in the pool, and I was able to spend time myself with him (although I am not much of a swimmer myself), and helped him to get over his fear of the “deep end” and encouraged him to apply what he had learned. I bought him some floating devices as well as snorkeling gear toys, just to try to add some fun to his times in the pool. It was not long before David and I were celebrating together! He managed to swim the entire length of the pool, from the deep end to the shallow end, on his back! We celebrated together, and David was so proud of himself. I was very proud of him too.

Here are some photos of that time together, that David and I spent:

July 3, 2010 – David enjoying a swim at the trailer park with dad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

July 4, 2010 – David enjoying a game of catch with us, at the trailer park.

I have many more photos of that weekend with David, including the campfire we had, David eating roasted marshmallows, and having fun listening to Irish folk music while we sat around the campfire.

In addition to this photographic evidence, there were also other dates in July of 2010 in which I spent time with David, and when I was not spending time with him, sent him emails and had phone conversations with him.

So, between May and July, is this evidence of a father who “barely attempted any contact” with his son? But wait.. there’s more.

In July, I bought David a Buck pocket knife with a folding blade. He and I spent time together while I taught him knife safety. He and I both agreed that for now, perhaps that pocket knife should be left with me. We discussed how a knife is a to be only used as a tool, and that like other tools, there are safety rules we need to know. David and I then spent time as I taught him to whittle sticks into something we could use to roast marshmallows and hotdogs with.

August 2010 Contact With David:

I’m not much of a swimmer myself, but getting into the pool with David continued to be a fun experience. One day, in mid August, while I had David with me, and we were in the pool together, I made a “little dive” into the water in an attempt to have some fun and grab at David’s legs.  Ooops! I underestimated just how shallow the water was.. and boom.. my nose struck the bottom of the pool. Man that hurt! Damaged my nose good.

Here’s a photo of David and me, shortly after that experience, taken in early August:

David and Dad, About August 15th, 2010

 

I did not have David for the entire month of August, but I certainly saw him a lot, quite a number of times after sharing emails with his mother and making arrangements with regard to his and her schedule and my own abilities to have him, and the transportation that was available to me. In August, there were several times I had him on different dates, and for extended periods of time.

In addition to this, David and I spent an evening together, on a blanket, staring up at the sky at night, looking at meteors during the Perseid meteor shower. We saw some real dandies together, and “oooohed” and “ahhhed” several times, after some time of waiting patiently for the Perseid show to get going. We talked about what meteors were, the difference between a meteor and a comet, and simply enjoyed each other, laying on that blanket after a bit of a hike that we took to a very dark spot, along with some bottles of apple juice and other snacks.

In mid August, my girlfriend at the time had her older son Kade arriving from Alberta to visit. When Kade arrived, one of the first things we did was pick David up and take him to the trailer I was living at. We had a campfire all together, that night:

About August 15th, Kaden, David & Colleen, holding up my Ulster Flag at my trailer.

We had such a fun time together, but because of Kade’s schedule while visiting, we took David home the next day. I then spent time with Colleen and Kaden for several more days, but before Kaden returned to Alberta, we had another day or two with David at my trailer. We managed to get in more swimming and other fun stuff that David thoroughly enjoyed.

 

It was a lot of fun for me to see the big smiles on David’s face while enjoying the company of Kade, from around August 21st to August 23rd, 2010. And yes, I have photos of that time too!

David & Kaden in swimming pool. David holding soccer ball we use to kick around and the same ball I’ve taught him some basic soccer skills with. About August 21/22, 2010.

I actually have tons more photos from these days with Kaden, Colleen and David that I have forwarded on to the person that has made the hurtful and outright lying assertion that I “barely attempted to have contact” with David. I will save them from being posted here on this particular blog post for the sake of length, but I would like you, dear reader, to know that there are plenty more.  There are at least 19 more photos that I took personally, and I know there are more that Colleen took. What I am providing is just a quick overview – the fact is that I have far far more evidence to show that the claim that I “barely attempted contact” with my son David is utterly false. And utterly disgusting, to me.

End Of August And Into September Contact With David:

Shortly after the above photo was taken, along with a bunch of others I have, Colleen and I took David home to his mom in Orangeville, and then spent the last few days of Kaden’s trip to Ontario showing what we could, in what time we had, Toronto. Then dropped him off at the airport.

In late August and into early September, I again had David for an extended period of time. Again, we had a ton of fun together that included water gun fights, swimming pool fun, campfires, and some pretty cool nights too, when we needed to bundle up. Manoman, David had fun with that watergun!!

Late August, 2010. David arming himself with the water gun.

 

That water gun stuff was funny. Not only did he enjoy using it, when the days were hot, he loved it being used against him! He’d ask ME to fill it up, and try to squirt him with it, as he ran and tried to hide, then sneak out, daring me to actually “get him” with it.

Of course, part of the fun was that I did manage many times to soak him with it. He’d run, and twist, and turn and giggle, and laugh his head off, and yell, “Ok Dad!! Try to get me now!!” as he tore off in a run, and then peek around the side of the trailer. He also had his own sense of saucy fun too (I think I taught him some of that…):

Here, David and I were co-conspirators, as he stood waiting outside the trailer, waiting for Colleen to come out – and surprise her with a long blast of cold water from the water gun.

I won’t publish the next set of photos, but they are hilarious. Colleen exited the trailer, with a big pot of water, ready to defend herself against the onslaught of David and his water gun aiming skills… only to find herself unable to reach her target in her defense as David mastered his water gun skills.

But it wasn’t just fun we had. We had to eat too. In addition to showing David how to cook meals in a cast iron dutch oven over a campfire, or simply roasting food and yummy snacks like marshmallows on sticks we whittled with knives and remembering our “knife safety,” we also went out and bought local corn and had our own corn roasts too.

There was one occasion in late August or early September, when I had David all on my own for several days, that we enjoyed a corn roast and hamburger barbecue, arranged by the social club of the trailer park. However, this photo is of David eating corn that we purchased from a local farmer on a different occasion in early September when I had him and was spending time with him.

Now that you’ve got this far, dear reader, is this the activity of a father that “barely attempted any contact” with his son? Ah.. but there is the rest of September to discuss too.

September 2010 Contact With My Son

September 2010 was a bit of a tumultuous month for me, and I won’t get into all the details. Suffice to say that in mid to late September, I ran into a situation where I was given a choice about something, and after missing my son David very much, I chose to hitch hike to Orangeville from Guelph to see him.

It was not my initial choice, but when “push came to shove” so to speak, I needed and wanted to see my son again, and memories of the awesome times I’d just had with him, a week or so previous were still strong in my mind.

On a very cold, rainy night, I packed a bag, walked 45 minutes over to Highway 6, and stuck my thumb out at about 8PM. Unfortunately for me, there was not that much traffic that night. I needed to my son though.

Shivering, cold and wet, I arrived in Orangeville about 5AM the following day. I have to admit, I did meet some interesting people while hitch hiking to Orangeville in order to see my son. And I spent several days with him there, while also working and trying to strategize business plans with his mom.

No, I have no photos of that particular occasion, but I do have written records as well as email correspondence to back it up.

If my above account IS correct, is that a dad that anyone could rightfully claim that had “barely any attempt” to contact his son?

Ah October.. Autumn.. Contact With David

I was struggling personally, I admit during September. I managed to get some things straightened out, so I thought. And next thing we know, it is October! What kind of contact did I have with David in October? Quite a bit actually. We all know there is a long weekend in October here in October. Did I “barely have any” contact with David that month in that year, 2010? Well…. you decide if that was the case.

It’s a crappy photo, I know. But that is David, with me, on the long weekend in October of 2010. It was also my birthday that weekend.

We spent that weekend together, saying good bye to the trailer for another season (actually, another season never happened, but that’s another story), and having fun with the fond memories we created together over the past five months. The swimming pool was now closed (it’s in the background) and it wasn’t warm enough to even think about swimming. It was jacket, hoody, and fleece weather. Even during the day.

We also too advantage of the fact that we still had some opportunities, before winter came and the snow would fly, to go bicycling yet again.

That is David on the left, Colleen in the “middle,” with my bike on the right. That long weekend of October was a weekend of trying to fit in all the things I had done with David together, over the past months, into one weekend, and all the things I had hoped to do, but wasn’t able to. It was a bit of a mad scramble, also needing to close up the trailer for the weekend, and talks about maybe, just maybe, we could cross country ski into the trailer during the winter months, and retrace our steps, and see the differences. between the warm months and the cold months. There were a lot of hugs, a lot of laughs and smiles as we reminisced about the previous months we had enjoyed.

Unfortunately for me, I still had not really gotten any further with getting  a place I could call my own. My love for David, and my priority that he was to be included in whatever life I had, and whatever home I had, was and still continues to be, one of the most important things in my life.

So now that you’ve read about May, June, July, August, September and into October (and I have even more that I have not presented here), do I look like a dad that “barely ever attempted contact” with my son?

Ah.. Winter Is Coming And I’m Still Not Settled – Contact With David:

For me personally, I was disappointed in myself. In May, it was my goal to get settled, have  a place I could call my own, and get on with my life, a life that included my son David. David was a huge priority to me. At the same time, one has to live, work, and try to maintain relationships too. I did the best I could. I’m sure that in retrospect, I can be criticized, and I am quite willing to listen to that criticism and consider advice.

I don’t have photographic evidence at my finger tips, but into late October and then November, I have fond memories of having David and emailing his mom to make arrangements to see him.

We did some more bike riding together. I have one memory that is very fond, and for which I was so impressed by, that I emailed David’s mom.. it was about late October, when David helped me put together some Ikea furniture. I’m pretty lousy when it comes to those idiotic diagram (ok, idiotic to me) instructions, and David and I had to put together about four different pieces of furniture, relying on Ikea’s instructions. I could not have done it without David.

Maybe it’s his experience with Lego kit building.. I am not sure, but having David help me figure out Ikea furniture instructions was awesome. We built several pieces of furniture together, with David being the “understander of the instructions.”

I bragged in an email to David’s mom about how amazing David was.

In early December 2010, the period in question  where I apparently had “barely any contact” with David, was about to end. Some other things events were to occur, which were sad for me on the one hand, but would force me in a sense, to return to Orangeville, and leave other options I had hoped for, far behind.

On about December 5th, I advised David’s mom of this fact and her reply to me was that I was most welcome to try to figure out some things, with David in my presence as he apparently wanted even more of me in his life.

Questions

Questions to The Person Who Has Made False Statements:

Why? What’s in it for you? Why did you make the false statements against me? You’ve had intimate knowledge of what is true. Why did you make the false statements against me? Why did you make those false statements to some of David’s relatives and people he has a very strong relationship with, being in a position that you are to sway their opinion of me?

Do you have low self-esteem issues?

Why, if you truly thought your statements were correct, why did you not bring them up with me personally? I have records of conversations with you, and at no time did you EVER suggest to me that you had a concern about my time, or my desire to spend time with my son, was a concern to you? Instead, you smeared me with others who David has a relationship with, and lead them to believe things that are not true.

Why? I do not understand.

I have tried to understand; this is not the first time you have done and said such things about me. Indeed, recently, you accused me of some other despicable things, that my eldest son was privy to. You accused me in the past of making holocaust denial statements, and then when I challenged you on your statements, you continued with your lies, and lied about what had actually occurred 7 years ago.

I pointed out to you the facts of the matter here, wherein my business partner wrote an open letter about the allegations: http://web.archive.org/web/20060306044956/http://www.ianism.com/

When you were challenged on the discrepancy between what you wrote and alleged, you came up with a lame excuse; something about your memory not being very good.. but you never responded to the fact that you seemed so able to make the false allegations in the first place. Your apology was to me was trite. I don’t accept it.

What is your purpose in making these false allegations against me and to people who have a strong relationship with my son David, and who I hope he always will have such a good relationship with? What is your purpose in lying about me? I love my son very much, and I do believe the evidence is there, over the years, that I do. I have not been perfect, but he’s always been a huge priority to me, more than many will ever know. What is your purpose in making statements that are slanderous and libelous against me?

I’m not a psychology major, but based on what I know about you, I think you have very low self-esteem, so you need to find a way to put others down, to make yourself look good. I’ve discussed this with you, and you’ve admitted to me privately that you might need help with some communication and lying issues.

I won’t say who you are.. but even with the preponderance of evidence that I can provide in response to your allegations, you have shown zero remorse for what you have done. You have shown absolutely no sense that you understand the hurt and distress you have caused, with this one example of false statements and lies, and there are actually many more. I have plenty of evidence to show, over the years, that I’ve tried my best to attempt to come to resolutions about some things, but you will not maintain them.

Why?

Why are you so willing to tell lies about me? I love all of my sons, and that includes my youngest son David. I would die for him. So what is in it for you to libel and slander me? And persuade others, who my son has a relationship with, and who my son respects and loves, to believe such utter falsehoods about me?

What is your point in doing that? For what reason?

Personally, I think you need help. I wonder if you, as good a person as you are other in other respects, should even have contact with my son, when from a deeply moral position, you are willing to tell lies, smear me, put me down, But if you can so easily tell lies, without having any thought for the future potential of devastating consequences, I don’t understand whatsoever. I have fought for my son, and for the very existence and ability of his two parents, to parent him. Why would you tell such lies about me?

Questions to The Person(s) Who Has Heard False Statements:

If you are reading this, and have some knowledge of what I am talking about, quite likely you might have been the recipient of a few emails – one in which I requested you be a mediator. I’m not stupid nor am I unable to understand that you might have some biases yourself. I get that. It has been my goal to get issues straightened out. In private, if possible. When it comes down to what I love, and value… I will tell you, I will fight. Maybe I fight the wrong way at times. I don’t know. I love passionately, and sometimes end up being hurt passionately. What has been said to you, and what you have been lead to believe, I feel very very hurt about. i would not care if your name was “Joe Blow” from Newfoundland, but you are not “Joe Blow.” You are a person my son admires and likes.

I know my son admires and likes you. He loves you. I respect that. I don’t want to change that. I’ve asked you for help in the past, and then I I know I further asked you, when in a condition of my own hurt and feelings of betrayal, wrote some things in utter frustration and under the influence of alcohol, that did not come out right. I know that. I am sorry for that. My attempts were however, very sincere. I love my sons, and I love David; I know for a fact that my three older sons will vouch for my adoration of David. I’m pretty sure that although I’ve made mistakes, my three older sons will vouch for me and my love for them, and I’m very sensitive to mistakes I’ve made, and I strive to do better.

That is also my personal commitment to my relationship with David, and there is NO TIME in his life, when I “barely attempted to contact him. Why a person would say that about me, I do not know. In some ways, I saw David as a way to correct some things about me, that I might have not done so well with my other three older sons. For anyone to accuse me or lead others to believe something opposite is simply disgusting, hideous and disgraceful on their part. And when shown the evidence, and unable to provide a sincere apology that indicated true remorse on their part, I don’t know what to say to that.

It is hurtful to me, it is horrible to me, it is a hurt and a despair that I cannot explain, to think and realize that a person close to David, and to you, would make such outrageous statements, and lead you to believe something for their own personal interests, their own psychological problems, and not admit to the truth.

I don’t get it. But then, I’m a guy that spent the greater part of four years in a hospital when I was a kid, and there was lots about life, and the reality of life, that I never “quite got.” When you are a kid, and the kid next to you gets wheeled out of the room, and never returns, you learn some things at a pretty early age. Games and bullshit don’t matter anymore. Social games become totally unimportant.

Questions For The Reader Who Just Happenchanced To This Post

Do you have values? Are there things that you agree are just not what one does? Perhaps making some personal stuff is one of those values. I understand. But what happens when it just never stops? And you know.. and you learn.. some hideous lies have been told against you, for the sake of some other person’s self esteem issues, or psychological issues? I don’t know. I don’t have the answer to that. I know we have a court system, and going to court over all of this is not out of the question to me, but I also know that doing so creates it’s own problems too. Without going to court, the other person is more than welcome to state their own case here, or wherever they feel there is a form for them, and allow me to respond. I don’t mind nor am I against that.

But as an objective person, based on the above, the evidence I have provided, do I look like a dad that “barely had any contact” with his son from May 2010 to December 2010? Do I look like a dad that had no interest in his son? I know there are some “deadbeat dads” out there, but I’m pretty sure I’m not one of them. But when you hear or read, “so and so made barely any attempts to contact their son,” what is your first impression?

Ah.. another deadbeat dad. I get that. But I’m not a deadbeat dad. I sure am not perfect, and I still have lots to learn, but I’m not a dead beat dad that barely had any contact with my son.

This insinuation, along with other utterly false allegations hurts me. I hurt more than you might know. The person that has made these accusations has refused, even after being provided with the evidence that their insinuations are not true, to show any true remorse. Their response is an intellectual response, a response of trying to find some little way an “i” might not be dotted correctly or a ‘t’ not crossed right. There is no remorse.

There is no remorse for the damage that they have done. I’ve actually put myself out there, to others, and my sons, and asked, “how can I be a better dad. Please tell me,” and have been sincere, and I am positive, that although my older three sons can have lots of stories to tell how I wasn’t a good dad, they can also say that I improved, learned, and tried.

To My Son David:

I do not know the motivations of others in attempting to put me into a light of someone that barely made any attempt to contact you. It makes no sense to me. I do not love you more than my other three sons; I love you all equally. I watched my eldest son with pride, drumming, and showing his skills … and pride wells up in my, and tears in my eyes come to the surface, that I cannot stop.
I think about my second eldest son, James, and the stuff he has been through in his life, the things he has conquered, memories of taking him to a speech therapist when he was younger and yet today, to listen to him, he is a man who could teach elocution lessons. He thinks, and has his own major skills.

I think about my third eldest son Colin.. he looks so much like me, and yet in many ways we are different, but we love each other. He’s an emotional passionate guy like me, he’ll fight, but he loves… he’s willing to use his fists, but he sheds tears too. When he was younger, we found rocks together, that just seemed to be meant together, a “sign” of us being “special together.” I love him. He loves me.

And you know what David? I was stupid. After you were born, I worried about those three boys of mine, having issues learning I had a fourth son.. boy was I dumb!!! When they realized I was telling the truth, and not joking around, they got serious, “Ok dad.. take us to him now,” they demanded. And they loved you. And they ganged up on me, when you were about three years old and I called you their “half brother.” They told me in no uncertain terms, that I was never to refer to you ever again in my life as their “half brother.” You are “their brother.”

All three of them talked about amongst themselves, and approached me, and told me that in no uncertain terms was I ever to call you their “half brother” ever again.

I had tears in my eyes and a smile on my face, as I listened to them. I guess I did something right, among the many things I had done wrong.

Your dad loves you, David. For any person to ever make a claim that I “barely attempted contact” with you is absolutely wrong, a total lie, and something I cannot explain. I am sure your mother, in reviewing emails, correspondence, and other activities will vouch for this. I am sorry that there are people that you have a relationship with, would even have that sense or idea  of me. It is disgusting, and yet I must respond due to the relationship to you of the person that has made such idiotic, untruthful statements, for their own purposes. And this person is in a position to have a lot of influence over you, and to influence even just subconciously, even if its for a short time, and influence relationships I have with others that also love you.

I am sad that this person appears to have no remorse, no regret, and no concept of the hurt that has been caused by their statements. I wish I could protect you from this person; a person that would make such statements and slander me and our relationship.

I hope that maybe, someone will see the light.. and perhaps encourage this person to get some psychological help. I hope that this person will do no further damage to relationships that I might have, that you have. I will fight for that.

I love you, David Hugh Scott. And there have been times in my life, when things have been screwed up.. but I have NEVER forgotten about you, and I hitch hiked to see you, to be with you, and made arrangements for you to know how important you are to me. I continue to fight for that, to this day, David. You are awesome. I am sure your older brothers, who have also been through some crappy times, at times, know, and will speak for me, as a dad that loves you very much, and they know how much of a priority you are to me. They know, and I sometimes get afraid they will be jealous of how often I speak of you to them…. and yet, you know how often I speak of them, to you.

I don’t care who the person is; I will not put up with ANY person, telling lies, and uttering falsehoods about you, and how important you are to me. Indeed, I have years worth of evidence (not that you will need it yourself, but for anyone interested, it is there) of my love and devotion to you, along with also trying to deal with business and other personal matters.

To the person that has made these utterly false and hurtful statements and refused to ackowledge the hurt that it has caused… screw you. I’m done with you. I’ve defended you, I have many records of that, I have kept many things private, you have failed to show any remorse, you will hang on to my mistakes that I have made, and use them for your own personal advantage, while failing to acknoledge your own over the years, you are guilty of slander and libel toward me when it suits you.and I’m sure, you are simply trying to find and look for ways to intellectually defend yourself.

 

Which is fine. Go for it. I have my tears as a record, when you wanted to use them, your lies, your utter crap, and my loyalty to you … even when you lied. Today, I AM a bitter man, and you are more than welcome to hold that bitterness against me. Don’t you dare ever fucking hold that bitterness against me, in regard to my son, the son I worked so hard to make sure I had, the son that his mother wanted to adopt out and not tell anyone about, the son that I was told was miscarried in a toilet and my feelings were used, and I stuck by the mom.  Many times.

The lies that some have been told and lead to believe about me are utter and absolute crap, and I will hold you responsible for them. You have never ever given me an apology that is real, and with a sense of remorse.

You are no friend to me and my son David.You have no idea the hurt and absolute anguish you have caused. You have shown no remorse for your lies. I have a bazillion records of emails and attempts to get things straightened out with you, in good faith. You have so often and far too often, replied, or not replied, in totally bad faith.

You have shown no remorse for what you have done. Zero. I don’t know what your agenda is. Your false agenda ends now, however. If I have to go further, I will. I will, for the sake of my son. I will not put up with what you have said, written, or implied and you think there are no consequences. You have stolen from me, awesome moments and memories of me and my son, for your own purposes, and with your own smears.

i am not putting up with it anymore.

It is not a competition, it is not a struggle for who is right, it is not any of that.. I’ve already done what is right, even when life’s circumstances have gotten in the way.. David and my other sons that have older, have meant the world to me. You, however, keep getting in  the way, and use my efforts, and turn them around, and lie about them. And make me look bad, when you should not.

Your criticisms of me are welcome. Please feel free to comment.

Do I look like a dad that “barely ever attempted contact” with ANY of his sons, let alone the fourth one, who today is ten years old, and who just the other day, I showed him how we make home made “chips” – what some call “french fries,” as we did thing together.. cutting up potatoes, frying them in lard, eating pizza and our “chips” together, while watching a movie?

And my little boy and I, got out the bench press, and the dumbells, and worked out together..and laughed, while I encouraged him, and he could flex his muslcles and say to his mom, “Hey mom, feel the rocks I somehow grew in my muscles?” while he laughed.

 

What sort of person would tell others and try to make others believe, that I “had barely no attempted contact” with my son? I don’t know

 Update November 24th, 2014 – Wendy Woudstra has been provided with plenty of opportunity to make things right as far as her lies, but has failed to do so. It is therefore now time to “out” her as the person that made the false accusations about me. It is very sad a mother would stoop to these kinds of lies about a very active father in his son’s life.

Wendy, I am so very tired of your lies.

Dear David…

(I posted this on my FB wall at about 6:30AM on August 6th)

August 6th.. Yes, the Martian Curiosity machine has landed. That is neat. As I write this, ten years ago, to the hour and almost to the minute, I was the sole attendant at the birth of an amazing little boy. No doctors, no ambulance (not enough time), and much panic… and desperately recalling all of my First Aid training.. Happy Birthday to a most special boy, David Hugh Scott. You are now ten years old, and what a joy you’ve brought to all that know you.

It is teasing when I tell you that you need to start going backward in age.. that you are actually turning 6 all over again… or 3.. or 7, or 5.. because of the amazing memories you have brought me and others over your decade worth of life. I am glad you can laugh at my teasing and have learned yourself to be a bit of a tease at times, with your cheeky humour. I love your “knock knock” jokes and the ones you make up yourself. But then, I look fondly back on your creativeness when you were 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9 years old too, and the smiles you motivated, and the people you have touched.

I love the fact you love your older brothers, Alex, James and Colin. And I know they love you. And circumstances are such that you don’t get to see them all the time; but it’s ok with you – you’ve never learned anything different, so it’s all good anyway.

I am proud of what you have accomplished in your ten years of life. I am one of the most luckiest of fathers I am sure; I have four sons that are awesome and terrific, and you happen to be the youngest, and please don’t ever forget, as a dad, I had three before you; they were not “experiments” but all of them taught me something about being a dad. I know I still have lots to learn. And I will make mistakes. Some of them I’m not sure if they can be corrected. But I will always love you.

David, ten years ago, almost to the minute, you took your first breath, and I held you and fell in love with you. I have aged, and probably have not done as well with age as others, but you have done so much with growing and learning, through your youth. Part of me lives vicariously through you, and your three older brothers as well.

There have been times when it’s been your very existence along with your brothers’ existence that has motivated me in times I felt down and wanted to give up.

Happy Birthday, my “wee man.” You might think I am celebrating your birthday, but.. I am also celebrating decisions I made, a decade ago, and am so happy with them. So many parents talk of their children as if they are some how a burden.. I am blessed in that regard in that none on mine ever have been a burden, and indeed Mr. David Hugh Scott, you’ve proved over and over again just how amazing it can be to observe, watch, and love, a child can be. i wish I could give you the world.. but I can’t.. yet at the same time, I am sure in my knowing that you will do and become what you are capable of. I am proud of you, just as I am proud of Alex, James and Colin too.

I love you, David, and as I have fond memories of how you were at 1 year old, or two years old, or whatever age I have in my memory, I look forward to watching you grow, giving you advice which you are free to ignore (cuz lots of it did not work out for me anyhow), and with your thoughts and ideas, do what you can to live another decade, two decades, three.. five.. seven.. ten…

I love you, David Hugh Scott. So much. Happy Tenth birthday, my wee man.

Leafs Lost – But It Was Entertaining

Another one of the things I have a passion for is the Toronto Maple Leafs. I have spent over 40 years, being a fan of the team and have hoped to someday see a Stanley Cup. No idea if I will ever see that; for the past several seasons just hoping to see them make the play offs would have been a dream come true!

This season, there is a bit more reason to hope they will make the playoffs. Tonight, they did lose to the Winnipeg Jets (2-1), but it was an entertaining, fast game. And the Leafs had won their previous 3 games. Can’t expect them to win them all although it would be nice.

On another note, my son David was here today. He has now been assigned to the “SWAT” team – not sure exactly what that stands for in his Karate club, but it’s where one’s leadership abilities and skills are apparent and you’re asked to help out in classes that are below your belt levels – to give guidance, assistance and be a “helper” to the other students.

Not bad for a 9 year old that has only been in Karate for a year!

And while he was here today, he had earphones stuck into his head. He was repeating over and over what to me sounded like mumble jumble.  But it was not – he has decided to learn Japanese!

I am really proud of him!

Posted by: Ian Scott